Don't Jump

Today started out GREAT. The sun was out, and I decided to go to the pool. So I changed into my swimsuit, and swung by the store to pick up some sunscreen, so I wouldn't burn. I went to the pool for a couple of hours and had a blast, just soaking up some sun and swimming in the pool. I made sure to feed Molly before I left, hoping that would make Dad happy and he could enjoy his lunch in peace.


After a couple of hours, I was getting really hungry, so I decided to come home and call it a day. I listened to some of my favorite songs in the car, and my day was absolutely perfect. This should have honestly been my first warning sign.


When I got home, Dad had just come back from a walk he'd taken on his break. I went upstairs and hung up my towel, and headed downstairs to grab a quick bite. Well, as I was perusing the options in the fridge, he came out. He hates when I keep the fridge door open for longer than a few seconds, so I shut it. That's when the bomb dropped on me.


He starts yelling at me for not working more hours, and for not getting up at 7 that morning to go out and find another job. He then gets on me, claiming that I mistreat my mother badly, and I admit we've had a couple of disagreements, but I never raised my voice to her like he said I did, or yell at her. He then PUTS ME IN A FREAKING HEADLOCK, which HURTS, and claims I'm only nice when I want something from her, and I need to stop hanging off of her like a twelve year old in public, because I'm an ADULT. He lets me go, but my neck takes a few minutes to adjust.


By this point, I'm terrified because he's yelling and cussing at me, and I start to cry. He then calls me a crybaby, and tells me to grow up. I admit that I wished him dead at that point. I wished that God would just strike him down...and me as well.


I can't take more of this crap. He gets off of work in thirty minutes, and I don't know how much more I can handle.


I wish someone would just save me. I am still crying, and praying that God would save me. I wish I could call the police and report a domestic dispute, but my dad was on the force and they'd never believe me.


Also, my dad wants me to account for every penny I earn, and give it to him. He says he will give me an allowance, and then he'll take the money to repay my mom for a few things I owe her for (I barely make enough to pay my gas and Kohl's bill, let alone pay someone back money I owe!)


I just keep telling myself 'don't jump', because I feel so close to the edge. I wish God would just take me now, and save me the pain of living with these ungodly, wicked people.